Crate: The MFA Journal at UMass Amherst

Entries from February 2008

Homing

February 13, 2008 · Leave a Comment

This is what we get. Weaker and weaker and sicker and sicker and then gone. Not much humor in that. The mother will soon become nothing. Gone, invisible, as if she never existed. As if it ever even mattered that she existed in the first place. He is driving to her now. The guy on the radio thinks the team made a good trade, callers disagree, how could they have let Denny go? Our Denny, friggin’ Denny. This is nighttime, when you can drive and push the scan button and hear AM radio from hundreds of miles away, from the vague mid-west, from the Yukon Territories. He doesn’t know who Denny is. The radio guys substitute friggin’ or frickin’ for fuckin’ and the censors look the other way. The mother will have a tumor the size of a lemon removed in five hours. He knows about sports but he doesn’t know who Denny is.

 

The mother needs more power strips. In her new house. Apartment. Her new apartment. Two months ago she sold their house, her house, she sold the house that her son lived in from age six-months to seventeen-years-and-eleven-months, that he visited every year since. The house now belongs to a rich, hipster New York artist who wanted to move upstate, to get away. The artist has hardly been there since he bought it, flying all over the world to art shows, following his model girlfriend to fashion shows. The son knows because the mother tells him the artist has a Russian model girlfriend married to a regular Russian guy. The mother knows because she has lunch sometimes with the artist. She says she worries about the artist, that he is naïve. The son thinks whatever. Then the son wants to thank the artist for giving the mother something to worry about besides him. The mother needs things to worry about besides him.

  (more…)

Categories: jamie berger

The Sign of the Promise

February 1, 2008 · Leave a Comment

“What do you have for tulips,” the man said to me in a soft, burred voice.  He dropped his hands on the counter, leaned forward a little, and raised his eyes to meet mine, putting even deeper creases into his forehead.

            “Tulips,” I repeated, turning to check out the rows of flowers behind me.

            “Color doesn’t matter,” he said.  “Just so long as they’re fresh.”

            Daffodils, black-eyed Susans, lilies, baby’s breath, roses, and there they were.  Today we had yellow and red ones, some vivid, some pale but no less attractive for it.  “Here we go,” I said, stepping aside to give him a clear view.  As he studied them, his head moving a few inches closer at a time, I pretended to stretch my arms so I could sneak a quick look at my watch; it was 3:53 and Lonnie was due to relieve me at 4.  I could count on him to be on time, strictly in the technical sense – he never showed his face before 3:59 or after 4:01.  A little more leeway would have been nice, but at least I could count on not counting on it.

            “Those three reds,” the man said, jabbing his finger out at every word.  “And those three yellows, right there.”

            One by one, I touched the stems of the flowers I thought he was referring to and gave him a questioning look.  Five times he nodded; the sixth he said, “No, the one above that,” then nodded again when I got it right.  He had basset hound eyes, wet and sad, and a broken-off chunk of a nose.  A jutting lower lip was the sole indication of character in his mouth.  He could have been buying the flowers for a bedside table or a gravesite; it was impossible for me to say.

            “I’d like them in a flowerpot,” he said.

            I looked up from the loose bundle in front of me.  “A vase?” I asked.

            He pushed out a breath.  “I think I would have said ‘vase’ if that’s what I wanted,” he said, his voice even softer now, not at all angry or sarcastic.  Which made it a lot more unsettling.

            “I’m sorry,” I said, my hands out to placate him (and to allow me another glance at the watch; 3:55 now).  “I’ve just never had anyone ask for a pot for cut flowers.”

            “And soil,” he said.

            “I’m sorry?”

            “I’d like them to be in soil.  Rich and dark.  Nothing dry, nothing crumbly.  Pack it around the tulips so they stand up straight.”  His eyes flicked up to meet mine.  “I’ll pay.”

            This was going to be a project, I could tell.  Lonnie wouldn’t be around if another customer approached; I could only hope it would be just the two of us for the next few minutes. (more…)

Categories: patrick robbins